Finding My Voice

Hi everyone! So I mentioned in my last post that I've been a bit ill recently, and to cut a long story short, I lost my voice for about 4/5 days last week! I have to say, having never been without my voice before, this was such a weird (if very frustrating) experience, which to me was rather like losing a limb, but I feel like I learnt a lot through this rather silent episode and especially as someone who's interested in linguistics and language!! So here are 5 things I've learnt about voice - appreciating it, using it wisely, and coping when you haven't got one!!

1. Your friends and family will very quickly see the funny side to it! I can't tell you the amount of times my mum's asked a question and had to stop herself and say 'oh you can't reply!' or 'tell me what's wrong? Oh dear I forgot you can't!' - don't worry, it was all in very good spirits and not to be taken to heart! If you don't know me well, you'll have had a lucky escape from my rather persistent speech (I could probably talk the hind legs off every animal in the farmyard, not just the donkey..) and so without it, there was a lot of humour to be found when I couldn't, for example, sing along (out of key..) to the songs on the radio, crack jokes or make my usual witty banterous comments! This provided much amusement to my family and friends!

2. Notepads are your saviour when you're voiceless - no joke, I carried a notepad and pen with me for the entirety of this week and had full blown 2 hour conversations in person with my friends (shoutout to Khushali and Hemali for bearing with me!) via the written word. I even had to write down my KFC and Nandos orders on paper because I couldn't explain them aloud.. Yes, shizz gets real when you need to non-verbally communicate that you'd like a wrap with halloumi and a mango quencher.. #notspon but I seriously want to thank everyone who was patient and understanding enough to stifle their giggles when I passed them notes! The guys at KFC were so sweet, I got a free bottle of water (which I didn't even ask for or initially accept) when I started coughing because they knew I'd lost my voice and was ill. Isn't that adorable??! Just goes to show that some people in this world are selfless and don't mind going the extra mile for others!

3. It's flipping frustrating! Now I only got to experience this feeling for a couple of days, but as someone who generally prides themself on being a linguist and fairly chatty, articulate person, losing my voice put me quite literally at a loss as to what to do with my day. I couldn't have heart to heart verbal phone calls with my friends at uni to see how they were settling in, or say hello, goodbye, please and thank you to waiters/bus drivers/cleaners which I usually do as an instinct. I felt so impolite and it made me sad to think that to these people, I looked like I didn't care. (Thankfully God always knows and I'm sure the good intention counts for something with Him ;)) Most interestingly of all, I'm a radio presenter at a local community station, and without stating (or miming) the obvious, I can't exactly present without a voice.. This meant I was restricted to behind the scenes producing that week (decided to go down nonetheless because radio is a big passion of mine, producing is fun and my team are so lovely!) - but to my surprise I found that even this was severely impaired by my lack of communication. Verbal communication is the fundamental basis of radio, even when you're producing (sorting out the show's order, talking to the presenters about what to say, planning ahead, briefing the team) - I was about a quarter as good a producer as I would have been with a voice, if not less. It's so hard to write notes to communicate your thoughts quick enough to keep up with a constantly buzzing show environment and when you can't raise your voice to get the team to listen, you lose authority! However I can't deny a really funny moment did arise from this - on my way home, fellow radio presenter Louis commented that the fact I could only whisper in his ear during a show freaked him out even more than if I was shouting!! This made my day as it must have been quite unnerving for him just hearing my whispered commands!

4. I never fully appreciated what I had in the first place with my voice. Deep moment, guys! It's so true that you don't know what you've got til it's gone *they paved paradise, and put up a parking lot* (if you got that reference you are very cool and I applaud you!) The use of my voice I missed most, other than general courtesies when out and about, was just having casual chats with my mum about what we're having for dinner, how my day was, exciting stories I had to tell.. It's those moments where having a voice matters most, not just when I'm presenting, or placing orders in a shop. Also it's infuriating when the phone rings and you have to contemplate whether to answer or not.. I mean it sounds rude if you answer and don't speak but is it worse not to answer at all..? For anyone reading this, I urge you to write now just speak to someone around you (I mean if you're on the tube this is best avoided.. I mean someone you know well!) about random life things, tell them how much they mean to you (again, strange bloke on the train = not the ideal target) and use your voice while you still have it! On a wider level, we are SO lucky to have freedom of speech and a democratic right to peaceful protest (something which sadly Spaniards don't have right now under new government laws :( ¡si alguien aquí habla español y quiere discutir este asunto conmigo, mándame un mensaje en el comentario!) so I urge you to go out and make the most of the fact that your opinion matters, and that you can change stuff, aided by a little (or maybe it's big.. I was never that good at Bio) voice box inside your throat! Your voice makes the difference between a country run solely by politicians and a country that you can help to change! Wow I sound like a politics speech writer.. (Shanita, that little pep talk was inspired by you for when you're PM and I'm your speech writer ;))

5. Actions speak louder than words (fed up reader: "oh for pete's sake stop with the cheesiness and the overly emotional idioms, Jenna" *slams laptop and runs away*) ok I'm sorry that I'm practically a mozzarella stick by now (yum!), but I can't count the number of times where a smile or a big hug (NOT the stranger on the train I assure you!) has transmitted my feelings more than a couple of words could. When I was catching up with an old friend, just being with her, her seeing my facial expressions and gestures, conveyed what I felt more than what I wrote in my notepad, and it's made me appreciate the power of non-verbal communication so much. In other news, I may even lean sign language one day.. watch this space!

So I hope this vaguely amused/informed some of you about my rather odd experience of life last week, and that you'll take something from it (perhaps it's just stranger danger.. Don't hug randomers on the tube: life advice!). Please understand that I in no way represent or aim to offend anyone with a permanent speech impairment or any form of disability (quite the opposite, I assure you) and this article is merely intended to entertain readers and provoke thought about the power of our opinions, voice and words! 

Sneak preview: my next post will be *drum roll* a top 10 under £10 makeup post! I love loads of drugstore / high street products so this is going to be such a fun one to write! See you then :) (unless you're a guy.. In which case, all the more reason to treat your mum/girlfriend/friend who's a girl/nan/ or even yourself!)

My World Speech

Hi everyone! First off, major apologies - I know I haven't posted on my blog for a little while now, and by way of explanation, I've been pretty ill!! I came down with some sort of virus and it put me out for almost two weeks, but the good news is I'm almost fully recovered now, and back to regular uploads :)

World Speech? What's that all about? Well recently I googled "deep life questions" (I was in a very philosophical mood everyone, don't judge!) and I came up with a page of amazing questions on a site called https://blog.udemy.com/thought-provoking-questions/ - so what better way to spend my time whilst ill than talking to my lovely friend Shanita about a couple of them! 

One of the questions that most sticks in my mind from the discussion we had is "If you could send a message to the entire world, what would you say in 30 seconds?".

In response, I typed out some spontaneous thoughts and came out with the following "speech" - and I realise that it's quite generic and more aspirational than practical. Anyway, here goes:

"Love yourself, love each other, find peace with each other because war only ever leads to pain and destruction. Find a way to solve your disputes and realise the important stuff to you before it's too late. Live in the moment, and be grateful for all you have. Help others as much as you can - you never know when you may need help back."

Now I've timed this and it's only about 20 seconds... I never was any good at estimation!

So what would you all want to tell the world, if given under 30 seconds? I'd love to hear your responses! 

Massive thanks to Shanita for listening to my late night philosophical rambles and not completely dismissing my nonsense!!

Guilt, Judgement and Running the Life Marathon

I recently spent a couple of days with some lovely folks from the Christian Union at my University, which has led me to a bunch of pretty life-changing realisations!! Even if you're not at all religious, I feel that we all have something to learn from these musings on judgement, both self-judgement and judging others, and the horrible burden of guilt, which I think should be left in the past, though not entirely forgotten.

1. Guilt: Focus on being a good person rather than self-condemnation. This really is the key to a positive mental attitude! One of the lines I heard during the residential was to "leave all sense of condemnation at the door", which is such a liberating experience and allows us to live in the moment, unaffected by feelings of shortcoming and regret. Believe me when I say that every single person on the earth has at some stage sinned, or done something they probably shouldn't have done, but focusing on the past, other than recognising that we are not perfect individuals, and what you can learn from mistakes, has no benefit whatsoever. If we live our lives with guilt in the back of our minds, our judgement is clouded, and we are almost rendered blind to all the awesome stuff we have done and could do. It's always the way that we remember one tiny, niggling regret rather than the other 100 acts of kindness we might have done in the past; it's just human nature to dwell on our flaws rather than our talents and capabilities. 

But here's the difference between condemnation and growth: the people who focus on what they can learn and develop from their sins and guilt get much further in life, and have a much happier time of things, than those who continue to feel a sense of regret and dissatisfaction. It's so so hard: I know this feeling all too well myself, whether it be remembering some exam grades that may not have been my shining hour, to times where I've made mistakes in friendships, been quick to anger etc.  (which let's face it, everyone else has probably forgotten and I'm the only one beating myself up about them!!). If you're struggling with this step, I encourage you to remember that, if you do have a faith, which I do, I believe that God is always merciful and forgiving. Once you come to terms with the fact that your mistakes are forgiven, since we are all imperfect and journeying through our own paths and obstacles,though you may never forget them, you'll feel a weight lifted off your shoulders! *cue Idina Menzel's Let It Go*

2. Judgement: Now that you've come to terms with personal weaknesses and flaws, and accepted them for what they are (learning experiences), learn to accept others in the same way. We all tend to judge people, if subconsciously, whom we haven't met, and often we don't even realise the stereotypes we may have of different groups of people. What good does it do anyone to have negative perceptions of others? Though it's much harder to live life through this lense, I think it's so helpful to treat everyone you meet as someone you can learn something from, whether that leads you closer to or further away from them, whether they become a future best friend or a distant acquaintance. Similarly, speaking about others in a negative light behind their backs is something we all know is best avoided. Why? Well other than the fact that this gossip could possibly lead back to them (oops), we have only seen a fragment of their lives, and it's unfair to judge anyone on a small segment of their behaviour (think of swans who are frantically paddling underwater, but to the outside world appear as happy as Larry!). Even if we feel we know the person very well, chances are that there's a reason why they are being particularly sulky, moody, or perhaps ignoring your messages. So tolerance, I guess, is the second step, as well as approaching new people with an open mind, something that it especially vital around the time of going to university, or making a fresh start.

3. Running the Life Marathon: Don't lose heart when you experience disappointments or when something goes wrong. This is the main message that has stuck in my mind from the Pastor's talks over the past few days (Andy Robinson, lovely guy!) - that endurance, and maintaining hope, can outweigh everything else. We all learn to develop a "thicker skin" having faced troubles, but we all need to be reminded sometimes that everything we experience, all the pain and suffering we may undergo, is only temporary and will
pass: so get back up and complete the marathon! For those of us who believe in afterlife, we may look to eternal happiness and joy to put things into perspective, when we cannot help but be overwhelmed by our problems. Something that could be beneficial to all of us, whether religious or not, is finding a few things that keep us sane, on the straight and narrow, and pick us back up when we feel guilty or burdened with stress. I'll list some examples that spring to mind: family, friends, music, food (especially of the chocolate variety, but only in moderation! Please don't use this blog as an excuse to binge eat, I'm merely recommending it as a pick-me-up!!), going on walks, doing a dance class, watching a Rom Com (Pau Pau, that one's for you, b ;)), painting your nails, having a de-clutter, writing a diary, reading a book, or, my personal favourite, tea. I'm one of those Brits who believe that a cup of tea and a chat with a friend can get you through pretty much everything (try it and let me know if it works!!). 

Now and then we need to be reminded of the support and love of our family and friends, so if you're struggling with self-judgement and feeling beaten down by things going wrong, that's exactly what
these circles are there to provide. Find a couple of people who never fail to make you realise when the wallowing and self-pity gets too much (a week of "Netflix, (pizza) and chill" after a relationship break up may not be the healthiest way to handle it), but who, on the flip side, warn you when you've taken on too much work, or have lost the work/life balance in the midst of essay crises (love that word. Crises.) These people really are the best, and I want to thank those of you in my life (you know who you are, my fab friends!) for the countless times they've put it all into perspective for me. Much love and virtual tea to you guys!!

I really hope this could be of some benefit to you all - even if only one of these pointers has rung true, it could make all the difference to living your life with one less burden, and a more positive attitude.

Have a lovely week and speak to you (virtually!) soon :)

Remember to leave a comment if this has helped you, I'd fall off my chair with joy if you did. No really, it's true!! 

Facing Your Fears

Hi everyone! So my latest post was inspired by a recent trip to the GP...

...to put it mildly, I'd describe myself as having a fear of needles. Now this is all well and good until it comes to the time when I need pre-university vaccinations, blood tests and all that kind of horrible stuff. So I've compiled a list of my tips for coping with your fears, be they big or small (such as a fear of custard, mud or perhaps tomato ketchup Iman!!). Please do note that I'm in no way a psychology or health expert (if you find these fears too overwhelming, don't hesitate to contact a professional!), these are just little things that help get me through those butterfly in stomach/shaking like a leaf moments in doctors waiting rooms!!

1. Try to put the fear into perspective, or rationalise whatever you're scared of. We've heard the age old phrase about insects - 'they're more afraid of you than you are of them' (debatable when you're staring a near enough tarantula sized beast in the face and are convinced that its mission is to eat you alive..) but really, it's true! In the grand scheme of things, one little needle in my arm isn't going to cause the world's end, and besides, it will be over in under a minute, leaving the rest of the day to enjoy life and forget all about it! Try to realise how small some phobias are when compared to more pressing matters in life. I'm not saying you shouldn't have these fears at all - it's perfectly normal and though some deny it, we are all scared of something, but it can help so much to think about things in perspective.

2. Music works wonders! Especially when faced with something such as a blood test, distraction and finding alternative focused is key. Personally I opt for some Ed Sheeran whilst at the doctors (calming, easy on the ears and an amazing voice! Though steer clear of Bloodstream if faced in that circumstance..) but try whatever helps to calm you down or put you in your happy place. Alternatively you may prefer to just talk to the nurse, or have a chat with a friend on the phone, for example, if you're scared of being on a crowded bus or alone on a train. It really is all in your mind, and often worries are magnified through a lack of alternative thoughts. Reciting song lyrics is also a fantastic solution as it means you have to completely concentrate on random words other than whatever you're having to go through. But perhaps keep this to silent, in your head reciting whilst on public transport...  Belting out Eminem lyrics on the tube mid-rush hour is rarely going to go down well!

3. Treat yourself after overcoming small hurdles! Now I'm not saying it's worth throwing a party every time you manage to successfully cross a road, but remember the amount of times, as a child, that your parents would give you little rewards for good behaviour or progress? Cleaning charts and gold star stickers aside, perhaps an ice cream or lunch out with a friend is the perfect way to end a day filled with a particular fear, if nothing else to cheer you up and put a smile back on your face :) this will also give you something to look forward to when faced with your scarf scenario!

4. See the humorous side of things, if at all possible! Funny story, while the nurse was trying to search for a vein the other day, unsuccessfully, she commented 'it must have seen me and ran away!!' - at the time, I found this hilarious, and it really relieved the tension and fear I was feeling. Maybe you're scared of seeing gory scenes in Casualty on TV but like to poke fun at the resemblance between fake blood and ketchup! (Sorry Iman this is probably not helping that sauceophobia..). Maybe when taking out a spider in the house, you can sigh and realise what a shame it is that this particular legged insect will most likely never feature in a David Attenborough documentary. This ties in with distractions, but is more specific: enjoying life's funny moments provides release and having studied comedy in my English course, I can confirm that laughter is in fact the best medicine.

So those were my 4 little ideas about overcoming your fears, one step at a time. Remember that something like this won't go away overnight, but over time, with some encouragement, you can grow and be proud of how far you've come in learning to be comfortable with what once used to scare you!

Hope this helps and see you in the next one :)

Jenna

Fear of Failure vs Striving for Success

Having recently finished my time at school, on reflection, I think it’s fair to say that some our motivation to study isn’t merely due to an desire to excel or succeed in our field; it’s due to the pressure to avoid “failing”: that could be falling below our predictions or not being able to progress to the next rung of the academic ladder. Motivations obviously vary from person to person, and I’m happy to say that in recent times, I’ve made a conscious effort to try and become a “striver” rather than a “fearer” (sorry, it's evident my grasp on English grammar has suffered over the holiday..), though as a natural worrier I find the anxiety surrounding failure creeps in nonetheless! 

This talk of “failure” all seems to link back in with my post about comparing yourself to others (as I feel so many of our stresses in life do!) – after all, aren’t standards of “passing” and “failure” regarding GCSEs and A Levels all based around how everyone performs relative to each other in the country (don’t quote me on that. I’m no expert on how the system works!)? It seems to me that personal goals and dreams have slipped into second place, behind the pressure to keep our heads above water and avoid doing “badly” (the term itself is pretty much relative to every individual). There’s a big difference in my mind between the two mindsets of FOF and SFS (excuse the invented abbreviations there..), and it can be so detrimental to a person when their sole focus is being driven by fear (this is probably backed up by science!).

Yes, of course there’s adrenaline which kicks in when we feel nervous, and I don’t deny that a certain amount of pressure is most definitely necessary to give us all a kick up the backside academically! 

It saddens me to think that some people (including myself, many a time) may feel more relief than excitement when they succeed, purely due to the strain they’ve felt to avoid, for example, their parents’ disapproval, or a feeling of low self-esteem, that is perhaps attached with achieving lower grades than desired.

It’s all becoming a system of points, letters, grade boundaries, and jumping through hoops, as opposed to saying to yourself “I’m just going to achieve the best that I can, without comparing my goals with anyone else’s, or other people’s expectations of me”. It’s the drive to have, say, a university degree or a high flying career, because it’s what everyone else seems to be doing, and hence you may feel like a “failure” compared to others if you choose to take the path less wandered, which to you may actually seem like a successful, happy one. 

Taking a step back from the “versus” battle between these two perspectives of FOF and SFS to throw a new concept into the mix: why are we so scared of failure in the first place? This is a very difficult and personal question, but I'd say it’s generally because we seem to aim for a life without mistakes, embarrassing moments or slip ups, because of how people may judge us, or maybe because everything we do wrong may stick in our minds and eat us up, leading us to view ourselves as bad people. Far from it! How else can we learn but through these flaws? Fearing failure in the first place, though a seemingly natural and common instinct, doesn’t make much sense when you consider that we actually learn 10 times (if not 100 times) more from failures than successes. Taking the example of Disney films, (specifically Lilo and Stitch, one of my all time favourites!) Stitch's growth comes precisely from the fact that he begins as a flawed character who wreaks havoc and ruins Noni's job prospects: if this hadn't have happened, his change in character and adoption into the family at the end would have much less gravitas!! I guess that all you truly learn from a success is that you worked hard and most likely are also fairly talented at a particular topic, and as fantastic as this is (of course I do promote success, it’s amazing!!) this learning curve isn’t nearly as rewarding as being set back, picking yourself up and learning what you did wrong (or in the case of mistakes that later reveal themselves as blessings in disguise, what you did right!)!

So I guess the conclusion to this ramble is that the ideal is to aim for success in its own right, not relative to “not failing”, but at the same time, it’s not the end of the world if your path takes an unexpected turn, which at the time might seem devastating. Fearing what’s to come, and letting that worry take over your mindset is a waste of time and energy that you could actively be using to pursue success! Think about what it is that you really enjoy, or a goal you’d really love to achieve. Don’t focus on the system itself and let the grading system dictate your feeling of self-worth – think of your passions and what inspires you! Be a striver! 

:)

P.S. Quick disclaimer: This isn't my complete view on the British education system. Overall, I've loved my education and don't regret the path I've chosen! This is just an issue I felt like discussing as it's quite current in my life, but this is no reflection on how the entire system works. No offence is intended with any of my posts and I hope this is apparent! Thanks :)

My Everyday Make-up!

Though I am in no way a qualified make-up artist or beauty blogger, I have been watching YouTube beauty videos for as long as I can remember, and love discovering new items and trying out different looks. So I felt it would be fun to share my favourite beauty items with the world through my blog!

This post includes all of the products which I wear on an everyday basis - think of it like a Top 10 Make-Up items/Favourites/Everyday look all in one! Hope you enjoy and might pick up some recommendations :)

1. Nuxe's Reve de Miel - Not technically a 'beauty' product but this is hands down the best lip balm ever!! And as my friends will tell you, I'm a bit of a lip balm addict.. this is super hydrating and smells awesome as well, I'd say it's citrusy. For a lip balm, pretty expensive, but you can pick it up at M&S and I guarantee it will last for weeks, if not months - so use it sparingly!!

2. Benefit's 'Big Easy' BB Cream - for me, this is the perfect balance between a foundation and a tinted moisturiser. This will give you a decent, if fairly light amount of coverage, but best of all it has SPF 35 (perfect to take on holiday and for summer!) and applies really smoothly. I actually tend to apply my base products with my fingers, to blend everything in nicely. The coverage is definitely buildable too! Worth investing in :)

3. Benefit's Boing concealer - believe me when I say I've tried pretty much every high street concealer on the market, and nothing compares to this little pot when it comes to coverage!! Benefit like to refer to this as "Industrial Strength" and though sometimes you need a few applications to cover blemishes, I'd agree. I also use this to cover pesky under eye circles! This isn't perfect for under eye concealing but it does the job (to be honest, anything that I can use to multi-task is a bonus, as I'm super lazy make-up wise!!)

4. Blusher by the Natural Collection in the shade "Peach Melba" - now for £1.99, I wasn't expecting awesomeness with this powder blush, but I can honestly say it does a really nice job, and took me ages to 'hit pan'! It's a lovely pinky peach shade which I feel would suit many different skin tones, and the pigmentation is decent too. The only qualm I'd have (love the word 'qualm') is that it wears off pretty easily, but if you're after long-wearing blusher, you could opt for Max Factor's Miracle Touch Creamy Blush which is fantastic too.

5. Benefit's Dallas Blush - so you may think I've gone a bit crazy, adding in two blushers to one make-up look, but hear me out!! This is a completely different type of blush, more of a bronzer, and it looks fantastic on Asian skin tones especially as it's more reddy/browny-toned (ooh look at me trying to use beauty vocabulary!). Also comes with a handy contour-shaped brush and mirror, so it's very handy for carrying in your handbag to top-up during the day! Sometimes I alternate between the two blushers, but on an all-out day I'll use both in one look (shocking, I know.)

6. Rimmel's Clear Complexion Powder in the shade "Transparent" - this translucent powder does a pretty good job at setting everything into place and mattifying, at a very good price. In all honesty, I'm not that big on powder, but I know many people swear by Rimmel powders and can definitely see why! Does the job, and OOH look the blue packaging matches my nails!! I got a bit excited when photographing that! (Essie: Turquoise and Caicos, if you're interested)

7. Benefit's Roller Lash Mascara - BEST MASCARA EVER. I have, again, been through a good few high street mascaras (the best of which was Max Factor 2000 Calorie) but this is something else. The wand is perfect for lash separation, and my eyelashes look so much longer after just one coat of this. Plus I love the retro look of the packaging! Then again, never judge a book by its cover and all that.. anyway, you decide! 

 8. Benefit's Gimme Brow - I'm going to look like a walking talking advert for Benefit by the end of this post (which I'm definitely not paid to do!! I just love their products!) but this basically strikes just the right mix when it comes to brow products. It has a cute tiny brush inside with some brown brow gel, and fills in your brows without looking at all drawn on or false. One of my good friends Iman shares my love for this little bottle of eyebrow perfection!

9. Soap and Glory's Sexy Mother Pucker (careful how you spell it!) Gloss Stick in Plum Jam -  bit of a disclaimer with this one, I love two different shades of this product for different reasons! I first fell in love with (literally, got through three sticks of it!) the shade Nudist, which is a gorgeous pinky brown, nude shade, perfect for an everyday gloss. But the one I'm holding in the picture is a much deeper plummy shade, and I think it's perfect for occasion wear! This picks up well on camera (for any of you who have seen mine and Paula's British Tag on YouTube, I have this on!) and stands out without being an all-out lipstick. 

10. H&M Powder Brush - now firstly can we just appreciate that I, a photographer newbie, took this artsy shot (thanks Darsh for appreciating my attempt at photo creativity). In the words of Despicable Me "IT'S SO FLUFFY!!" okay minor excitement over. This is a fantastic brush for blusher, bronzer and powder (I use it for all three, hence why it's slightly worse for wear..) as it's large and fluffy so doesn't concentrate the product too much on a particular area. I think I bought it for around a fiver in store, but sad times I can't find it on the website anymore :'( hopefully they still have this or a similar style in stock! 

 And voila.. here is the finished look!! #shamelessselfie #sibilance 

Hope you enjoyed this rather different post! And quick disclaimer: I purchased most of these products over a long period of time, as birthday presents, little treats or general additions to my collection. Also, I can only recommend the products which have worked for me, and so I can't guarantee they will all have the same effect for you all. But this was fun to write and I hope you got something out of it (if only discovering that I've made #sibilance a thing...) Let me know if you'd like more/less beauty posts in future :)

P.S. Update: today I bought the Revlon Lip Butter in Peach Parfait and it is beyond awesome. Watch this space for reviews!!

Why Results Day Won't Define You

Now I know I'm a bit late on the bandwagon here, in writing this blog post, but it may not have escaped your notice (who am I kidding? It's everywhere!) that it's A Level results day tomorrow and that for many Year 13s (like me!), it's the make or break time where we found out what university we'll be heading to in a few weeks' time. But panic ye not! I am on hand with 3 top tips for surviving the next few hours (and if you're receiving GCSE results, the next week!) while you nervously wait, hope and pray. Because the rational part of my brain tells me that this is not the end of the world, and we will all get through the day regardless of the outcome! (Side note: this is only a very spur of the moment, spontaneously written post!)

1. Put it all into perspective! So this whole education system can seem like an ocean, in which we are swimming against the tide as little fishies (forgive me. It's early in the morning and that's the best analogy I can come up with!) but it's so crucial to remember that it all comes down to making it onto the next rung of the ladder. Even if at the time, you feel disappointed with a result, or it's not as you expect, there's so many back up options - chances are, there WILL be another university out there in the world that is willing to offer you a place, and though it may be a slightly different path to the one you'd prepared yourself for, it could be really lovely. You can still study whatever you'd like to regardless of how this day goes!! But it may just mean sitting tight for a few more weeks potentially waiting for remarks, or perhaps you'll have secured another University through Clearing on the same day! Keep up the hope - you'll look back on this experience and realise it's WHAT you'd like to study that's the most important thing. Location, shmocation. (Understatement of the year. Oh dearie me this is going well..)

2. Don't lose rationality!! Towards results day, it seems to me as if the irrational, panicky side of your brain starts to outweigh the calm, reassuring aspect that's deep within. Granted, I'm no psychology expert but I feel like this all links in with panic and anxiety overriding our logic, leading us to forget all the months and months of hard work, dedication and hope that has got you through the exams in the first place! So don't lose sight of the memories of everything you did to prepare in the run up for exams, your teachers' positive comments: predicted grades aren't whipped out of thin air! You're much more wonderful than you believe yourself to be, so have faith and be rational - worries often derive from losing sight of reason!

3. Remember that everything happens for a reason. (Shoutout to the lovely Misha for reminding me of this awesome phrase in my times of madness!!) This is where I feel my religious faith has a huge role to play regarding results. There's nothing you can do to change what's around the corner, but the great thing is that whatever happens in the future is all part of God's bigger plan for all of us. In hindsight, how many times have you been disappointed or upset when you were younger, but now you can look back and realise the reason why that event had to happen, in order to learn a valuable life lesson? Failures become our strengths and everything that initially knocks us down will later build us up (buttercup baby just to let me down.. Someone stop me!!)

This leads me to consider two religious quotes that have reassured and comforted me in recent times regarding God's plan for us all. First of all, from John 13:7 'Jesus replied "you do not realise now what I am doing, but later, you will understand"' and secondly, a piece of wisdom I've found on the Internet, 'I am not afraid of tomorrow because I know that God is already there'. Though these two messages derive from my faith, I feel like many who are not religious could have a lot to gain from the idea of patience and hope ('later you will understand'); often the only way to learn is through the passing of time and through new experiences. Think of tomorrow as just another day, where you'll live and learn, and life will go on no matter what letters appear on that piece of paper!


Best of luck everyone, my thoughts and prayers are with you all!!

Thanks so much for reading! If you'd like any more specific academic advice posts, just leave me a comment and I'll do my best to help :)

P.S. Apologies to year 11s and 12s as some of this advice is very uni specific! But I hope it's of some support to you all!